Hot Chocolate

A little over a year ago, I stopped in the City with a friend on our way home from an education conference. We found a small bistro type place to have lunch on one of the piers on the Embarcadero. To cap the perfect meal, we ordered hot chocolate. Sitting outside on that cold, misty day, I enjoyed that cup of hot chocolate more than any other cup I've ever had. I came home and told my boys about this amazingly different dessert drink.

I was reminded of it, last weekend, when Brannen (our Christmas Spirit) gathered us together to decorate the Christmas tree. I wanted to add to the cozy feeling and serve hot chocolate. In an attempt to duplicate the yumminess, I searched the internet for recipes and I made a recipe using Creme Fraiche <--- very fancy.

It was disgusting... The proportions were all wrong and we had to do some major doctoring to our cups to even tolerate it while we decorated our tree. At that moment, I decided I would have to take the kids to that SF bistro some time so they could try it first-hand.

So, this morning, after the rarity of sleeping in until 9:30am, I decided to take the kids to San Francisco for hot chocolate. We haven't had as many spontaneous road trips in the last few years as we used to, and after reading a new book from the library and a new blog I recently discovered, I felt inspired for an adventure.

I sprung my proposition on the boys and we excitedly rushed through a handful of chores, ate some pancakes, Julian's friend joined us, and we were off on our mission. I grabbed some last minute coffee from Chevron, blared the radio, and we sang our little hearts out as we sped West. With 27 miles and 66 minutes left to go until we arrived to Downtown SF (that little electronic sign was unnervingly accurate), we slowed to a crawl, rolled the windows down and enjoyed the bay area winter warmth. As we searched for a parking spot, I realized I had almost no idea where we were going, I panicked just a teensy bit. I warned the kids that we may be doing a LOT of walking today. "Duh," they said. "We're in San Francisco." Sweet. I'm glad they understand.

The kids wanted to skip the chocolate and go play on that gigantic bow n ' arrow in the background.

For some crazy reason, it seemed like every meter parking section had signs that said Tow Away. There was no way I was paying $6.00 per every half hour in a parking garage, so I kept driving around until we spotted a totally safe spot.

Then, we were off to find the mystery hot chocolate spot. I remembered it was near the beginning of the pier section on the Embarcadero and it being where loading trucks came in. That was the info we were going on. We walked in to the first familiar-looking shop and I started to explain to the guy behind the counter that I was searching for this special hot chocolate that was "like drinking warm chocolate pudding." Almost not letting me finish my sentence, he exclaimed, "Yep! That's us." Apparently, it is very special Parisian style hot chocolate. No joke, we found the magical restaurant less than 200 yards from where I parked. Amazing.  "We'll take four cups please." Twenty dollars later, we're sipping our drinks and I'm anxiously awaiting their reactions.

The cafe is Boulettes Larder in the Ferry Building.

Brannen: "It's chocolaty."
Julian: "It's hot."
Nate: "Duh. It's hot chocolate."

Well, it wasn't as magical as that first time, but hey - at least it brought us to the City. Now, we had time to explore before we had to head back for a 6:30pm birthday party.

I guess they had a hankering to climb, so they jetted across the street to a large decorative wall surrounding the outdoor ice rink.  They climbed while I tried to figure out the humor on the Zamboni machine...

Someone please explain how they're bringing Hawaii to me with snow.

Next, I forced them to walk with me along the piers and enjoy the water and the ships and sailboats. They raced each other to the end while I took my time. When I caught up with them, I noticed the red boats of the SF Bar Pilots across the way. I explained to them that an elite group of marine pilots use those tugboats to move much larger vessels in and out of the bay from the ocean. Those skilled pilots amaze me. I try not to pass up moments to lure my kids into activities/jobs that interest me. You never know which little piece of trivia or hint might spark something.

SF Bar Pilots can earn $400,000 a year navigating large vessels through the dangerous waters of the bay!

I actually had to force them to stand still for that picture because they were so busy moving! They posed, so then I posed.

Then Julian wanted to pick me up, so I played along...

Love Julian's smile here...

We were trying to figure out what to do next and figured since we could see Coit Tower from where we were, we decided to go there. How difficult could it be to find? Well, we drove in what we thought was the right direction, but I guess with all the hills we lost the mark. I finally parked at what I thought was the Coit Tower and we all got out and everyone ran up the steps. Turns out it was a dog park and basketball courts. Hmm.

It proved to be a decent vantage point for us to look for the Actual Coit Tower. No luck, though.

So, off we went, up the hills, down the hills, through China Town, up more hills, down more hills, and stumbled across Lombard Street. Thank goodness! Another vantage point!

Not the best picture quality, but if you look close you can see the Actual Coit Tower way off in the distance.

As we finally found our way to the Coit Tower, we laughed when we realized it wasn't actually all that far from where we started. It's a funny adventure to drive in the big City. The great thing about SF is that it isn't very large, geographically speaking. So, you're only lost for a short while before you circle back to where you started.

We found the tower as the sun was setting. I was getting ready to splurge on tickets to the top, but the cashier foiled those plans by saying, "Cash Only." Really? A major tourist attraction in one of the largest cities and they don't take VISA? Fine. Back outside, we explored anyways.

Please disregard the dirty lens spots.

174 steps from the top,  Bay Bridge backdrop.

Brannen and Nate raced back up to the top. Julian and I took our time. With only pancakes and hot chocolate in our bodies, it was a bit of a struggle. I was happy for the workout though, especially after the last two days of Netflix-induced laziness.

One last snapshot from the other side, before we headed East toward home.

Sunset behind the Golden Gate Bridge, viewed from the Coit Tower parking lot.

Our goal was to be back home by 6:30pm for Uncle's 60th Birthday. As we started on the Bay Bridge at 5:53pm, I was a little skeptical. I made an optimistic guess that we'd arrive at 7:15pm. I told all the kids to think positive, flowing thoughts of moving cars. We cranked up the Christmas tunes and hoped for the best. Do you know we made it by 7:16pm???

It began with a quest for the perfect cup of hot chocolate and a spontaneous adventure. It's a little funny because I don't even really like hot chocolate. But, because I decided to do something spontaneous with and for my kids, we all got to enjoy the beautiful weather, impressive sights, singing together. I'm thankful that I have had the time to read books and blogs lately, written by people that inspire me to be better. I'm thankful for all the people out there that give me great ideas and help me be a more fun woman and mom.

We ended a fabulous day surrounded by tons of family for a big birthday celebration. Beautiful Christmas Eve Eve. In the words of Paul McCartney, "we are simply having a wonderful Christmas time."

The Word du Jour is Connectedness

Connectedness seems to be a recurring theme lately. I talk a lot about everything in the universe being one connected energy. I receive emails about how to have more awareness and connectedness. And for the last three years, my New Year's Resolution has been to be more present with and connected to the people in my life. All signs are telling me to anoint December as the Month of Connectedness.

If you think about it, it's only natural. Really. Let me explain. A lesson taught in middle school science classes describes how molecules react to temperature. You begin with a cup of water. All the molecules are close enough to keep the water together in the cup, but loose enough to flow when you tilt the cup back and forth or pour it into another cup. If you add heat to the cup of water, all those molecules get excited and start vibrating. They vibrate so fast they are pushing away from each other and, next thing you know, they're escaping from the cup, as steam. On the flip side of heat, if you place that cup of water in the freezer, the molecules slow down. Without all that movement, they settle in close to each other. Now that cup of water is less than a cup of ice.

People are like this, too. Have you ever noticed that in the summertime everyone is happy, active, busy? They're outside doing things, travelling, adventuring. Come Autumn, folks start to notice the temperature dropping and their lives slow down a bit. They prepare their homes, yards, and affairs for the winter - sometimes even subconsciously. By the time frost is on the ground and you can see your breath, you're weighed down with layers of clothes, you can hardly move around in your own home because the floor is so cold, and you sit and stand closer to the people around you. You're huddling for warmth. Every living thing does this.

It's clearly a natural time to celebrate and cultivate connectedness.

In the three years since I noticed my deficiency in this department, I have made a conscious effort to be more present in my moments. I try to slow down and look at my children when they talk to me. When I am thinking of a family member that lives far away, I try to take the time to call them. When I am grateful for something someone has done for me, I try to take a moment to send a note or email thanking them. I'm not quite where I want to be, yet. I still find myself too busy and my kids have to repeat things to me a few times. There are thank-yous that go unwritten or untold, even while they bounce around in my head. But... I am getting better.

The little things add up, though. I've got a whole pile of good connectedness from the last twenty four hours alone.

After I got the kids to school, still in my pjs, I swung by my parents' house for conversation over coffee. When they greeted me at the door, still in their pjs, I knew we would actually have some time to hang out for a bit and catch up. I was very thankful for that. It's hit or miss with those surprise visits. Many times, they're already on the move trying to get out the door to their busy day.

And then... as I was getting ready to call my grandparents after I wrote yesterday's post, I get a knock on the door. It was my beautiful neighbor standing there with a scrumptiously fragrant Christmas wreath for my front door. What a thoughtful gift! Thankfully, we had the time to sit and chat at my kitchen table for a bit. We talked of kids, friends, travel, and the appeal of intelligent, well-written individuals.

And then... I received a call from my out-of-state mom. It was the end of her work week and she was calling for update. I gave her the job search news. I didn't get that job. "Awwwww... bummer." It's actually ok, Mom, because there's a better one out there. And to this, I followed up with good news, which is another post entirely. Needless to say, she was very happy by the end of the phone call.

And then... my best friend, J, joined us for dinner. She came over with cabbage and a bottle of wine and doctored up the pot of pozole that I had started. Yummy! Even my boys loved it, despite their agitation when I told them we were having soup for dinner. While the boys got the movie night that they had been wanting, we sat in the other room talking for hours. We swapped stories of our teens and were relieved to know we weren't alone in some of the battles. We shared parenting strategies. We talked jobs. We definitely laughed, especially when best friend N called with her latest tragic funny. She's a trooper. Inevitably, she moves from feeling she's being laughed at to knowing she's being laughed with. I am grateful for their stories and we all value having each other to show us a different perspective on our problems.

And then... this morning I awoke to a beautiful quietness in my home and was finally able to make that phone call to my grandparents. As always, they were happy to hear my voice, as I am always happy to hear theirs. Grandpa asked me a question that was answered with a, "Well, I'm actually really happy being single right now." And that brought up a story from him. He told me that his grandmother, Bessie, did it on her own, too. She raised her children as a single mother (in the early 1900s in Florida). She earned money as a seamstress, working out of her home. He remembers her telling people that she could "make that for twenty five cents." They would bring her the material and thread and she would make them dresses, shirts, pants, whatever. She bought a two-story home and made rooms that she could rent out. Apparently, she was real strict. She didn't allow drinking, partying, carrying on, anything. If any one got out of line, they were out! There's another connection. I'm sure my kids will be happy to know that I come from a long line of strict moms. 

Grandma told me how proud of me she was that I have started this blog. She really enjoys reading about what is going on and my thoughts, and she's happy that I am able to type fast enough to keep up with the stories, as they unfold in my head. We rarely have time to have long conversations. We were both so happy to talk to each other this morning. Time is precious, and man, it doesn't stop for anyone. My resolve to make a trip to visit them was strengthened this morning. Come Spring, we are heading up for a spell.

On that note, the little clock in the lower right corner of my screen keeps ticking the minutes away. Please excuse me while I roust the boys so we can go connect with yet another friend. A few years back, we were invited to join her at her traditional cookie baking day. So, it is now one of our holiday traditions to join her and her crew for some messy baking and a bunch of warm fuzzies. 

If I keep connecting at this pace, there will soon be room for a new New Year's Resolution. Sweet! Maybe I'll start exercising regularly...

Give a Little Bit... of your Time

This morning, I had the pleasure of training a seasoned volunteer on a new Meals on Wheels route. He already drives two days a week, and now adding a third day on a new (to him) route. Meals on Wheels is a program offered through the Elderly Nutrition Program funded by the government, grants, and donations. It provides healthy meals delivered to seniors in the community.

When I realized that I would not be immediately returning to full-time employment, I decided to spend some of my time volunteering. A couple good friends of mine had been delivery drivers for Meals on Wheels in the past and told me that it was very rewarding to be a little dose of sunshine for these folks. Since I love being the sunshine, I signed up.

I filled out a form, sat through a short orientation, and was assigned a route and a day of the week. For the first few weeks, I had an "expert" tag along with me to guide me through the streets and explain the delivery procedure. After that, I was on my own. Quickly, I learned each person's personality and preference. There are some people that cheerfully greet you at the door, like Mr. J and Mrs. B. There are some people that hear you knock and tell you to come in and put the meal down on the table, like Mr. P and Mrs. H. There are some people that consistently greet you with an open door as you walk up to their home and make you smile with their cheerful, sunny disposition. There are some people that are not able to get to the door, so you just knock and walk in and bring the meal to them. And, there's some people that never want to see anyone, so you announce yourself, set the meal on the kitchen table, and hope you somehow brighten their day with your called-out well wishes.

It makes me happy to know that I am bringing a healthy meal and a friendly, human, smile to their day. In the short few months that I've been doing this, I've even noticed mood improvements in some of my "clients." 

Spending my time (one hour a week) with these folks - people who have or had families, careers, adventures - I have come to realize a few things. 

*I am Thankful* - All my life, in all of my families, I have been blessed to have elders, oldsters, grandmas, and grandpas. And, as they age, I am proud to say that the younger folks, without question, have taken care of them. All the generations of the family interact at family gatherings. When someone gets sick or frail, family steps in to take care of their needs and continues to love them and make them feel loved. 

*I am Surprised* - I am surprised by how many people don't have families like this. by choice? by accident?

*I am Stirred* - Knowing how many of us are fortunate enough to have working bodies, caring hearts, and extra time, I am encouraged to tell you about my experience and hope that it will send out a little spark.

*Spark* - Returning to full-time employment within a couple months, I realize that I will no longer be able to volunteer during the week. The Elderly Nutrition Program will need to find someone to fill my spot delivering healthy meals to local seniors one day a week. If you are unemployed or retired, please consider signing up. If you have a full-time job and aren't able to volunteer during the days, then perhaps in your spare time you can reach out to your own family members or neighbors. We all love when people acknowledge our existence. For our elders - people who are no longer in the social hustle and bustle - they really appreciate it. Drop someone a note, deliver some flowers, invite them over. You may be surprised at how enriching the relationship will be, for both of you.

For more information, visit http://www.elderlynutrition.org/ or contact me. Now please excuse me while I go call my grandparents.

Teacher's Pet of the Cosmos?

I like to entertain and inspire myself by reading my horoscope. I'm an Aries and I like what they have to say about me... Energetic. Passionate. Playful. Adventurous. Fiery. Joyful. Dynamic. Assertive. Outspoken. Brave.

I'll take that.

This week, the writers over at DailyHoroscope told me that I'm the "teacher's pet of the cosmos right now."

I'll take that, too.

I don't believe that means things will suddenly be handed to me on a silver platter. It's like the universe has been saying, "Paint the fence. Up. Down." Being a teacher's pet means that I've been showing up, listening, and learning the lessons being taught.  This might be where I will use my hard earned new skills. Perhaps, there's a dramatic crane kick in my near future?

If I've learned anything from Mr. "The Cosmos" Miyagi, it is to play to your strengths, acknowledge your weaknesses, and work hard for what you want.

I've found that when you embrace your strengths, people are drawn to your positive energy. When you acknowledge your weaknesses, you can begin to search out ways to improve, drawing strength from others' successes and failures. Introspection and self-improvement are hard work. And this is a perfect place to slip in a favorite quote from the movie A League of Their Own... "It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great." You may not see the great when you're sweating and crying, but feeling like the cosmos are ALWAYS smiling down upon you, you know you're doing something right.

I'm constantly telling my kids, "Good in = Good out." I firmly believe that if you make a conscious effort to do the right thing, even when it's not the easy or fun thing, the energy you add to life's song is beautiful and you get to hear it play back to you. You may not hear it right away, but the orchestra leader will bring it back in just when you need it.

This Thursday morning I get to sit at home in my baggy sweats and leisurely eat a yummy breakfast of oatmeal with bananas, pecans, and brown sugar. I've had a wonderful stranger, and her dog, knock on my door and hand me my son's lost wallet. I've enjoyed conversations with four of my best friends. There's beautiful music playing. I've had time to iron my son's outfit for his concert tonight, help a friend on a project, and vacuum. Before today is over, I will go on a walk, make a pre-concert dinner for my family, and check off a few things on my to-do list, including writing this post.

There's no doubt in my mind that I'm the teacher's pet of the cosmos. I just don't believe that it's only for right now. I feel like this through all the times of my life.

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, other than right now I just feel so thankful for every. single. thing. in my life. I will be writing about these things - making the connections between the hard work and the payoffs - over the holiday season. Meanwhile, if you find yourself in a "Wax on. Wax off." moment, pay attention. Chances are, you're supposed to be learning something very important that will greatly benefit you in the future.

Inspirational Beginnings

Last night, after a day of feeling overwhelmed by the blossoming testosterone in my home, I took a bath. Out of bubbles and scented salts, I made do with a fizzy thing my son found for me hidden in the medicine cabinet. With my new found relaxation, I managed to have two fabulous conversations with my sons before I fell asleep.

After a bit of coaxing, Julian talked with me about his future. He confessed that he has absolutely no idea what he wants to be when he grows up, but he is definitely going to college (one with a water polo program), and he is definitely interested in seeing other parts of the world (warm, beachy parts, preferably). We talked of friends and family members that have been to various colleges, traveled to different parts of the country and the world, and I encouraged him to ask these wonderful people tons of questions. The more knowledge you have, the better your choices and opportunities will be when the time comes. He seemed to understand that concept. I rattled off a list of people that he may want to talk to and I look forward to hearing his thoughts after these conversations.

I realize that both of my children have specific times when they are more talkative and apt to share things with me. When I join Julian in some sort of physical activity, like biking or tennis or playing at the beach, he opens up and spills a lot. For Brannen, however, it happens at the end of the day when I go to kiss him goodnight. Clearly, it's bed time, and I'm exhausted and ready to go to bed, but he wants to tell me everything at that moment. Fine.

As part of the process to help heal a recent pinched nerve, I have temporarily traded beds with Brannen for better sleep. After he tucked me in with his super soft blanket last night, he crawled in next to me and started talking. We talked about the past. He is every bit of a thirteen year old and the changes are going to take some adjusting to on both our parts. I recently commented to him that "I miss my daughter." He was totally offended. Last night, I told him a story of when he and his brother were toddlers and we regularly hung out with a group of friends. Two of us had two boys, the others had girls. I told him how chaotic and energetic the boys were and how the other moms didn't understand why we couldn't control our children. It was miserable. I was so thankful that at least one other mom, Julie, did understand. While the little girls would sit and look at a book or color quietly, we were busy gripping our children and shushing them. It was definitely not the most relaxing parenting phase. Brannen was one of the worst offenders - he was like a little bumble ball. Then he hit about nine or ten years old and as the battles with his older brother began, he became the Easiest Child Ever.

Brannen explained to me that he both loved and hated that. When he watched his brother and I battle, he was thankful it wasn't him. But he hated knowing that every time I asked for something, he would do it. And every time his brother would do one thing right, I would just be so happy and proud of that one thing. Brannen felt like he was doing everything right and he didn't understand why I wasn't jumping up and down with joy singing his praises all the time. I apologized and explained that it was so hard to balance what I said in front of him and his brother because all it did was fuel the sibling rivalry. I also told him that I was constantly bragging about him to friends and family. "You did?" Yes, kiddo. I did. You were my ray of sunshine.

Now we're in a different phase. Brannen assured me last night that this phase should only last a couple years before he's back to good. Each phase should last a couple of years, which would put the unpleasant phase beginning again at age 16. Um, no thank you. I told him to get it out of his system now. He will grow into his young adult self and use these times as learning and growing opportunities. It should only get better. (please be true. please be true. please be true.)

Fortunately, they're like a tag team, and they take turns. Thank the universe for striving to maintain balance.

Before our bed time conversation was over, Brannen suggested that we set up a camera and every day we record how the day went. That way we could look back and remember things that would have otherwise been forgotten. I thought that was a brilliant idea.

This blog is an attempt at just that. Blogging about important (and not so important) moments, so we have record of it. When I get more technologically savvy, perhaps I'll add some video moments.